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When newspaper Het Parool, as the first medium to publish an interview with me about Mannen met potentie* (Men With Potential), puts an online version of the article on their FB page, Parool followers and coincidental readers go insane. How is it possible that I, being a woman, am open about my fear of love with uncensored sensual pictures as proof. Some of them even showing my naked body.

Sex or no sex, readers seem to know for sure: I’m a slut and I’m only after cheap attention. An ‘attention whore’ someone calls it. Especially ’cause “the photos are snapshots, so not art.” And who do I think I am anyway, saying this is art (which I haven’t, but that aside). Repliers also predict my future. They are sure I will never find a guy and that I will end up as a lonely old cat lady with rattling ovaries.

Some of the comments are meant to sympathise with my parents. They are sorry for them that I confront them with my sexual whereabouts and issues. For the sympathisers it’s written in stone: no parent ever wishes nor should ever have to deal with a slut ass daughter like myself.

I didn’t have a fresh look at the comments after the post came online back then. But feel invited to find out in detail how Facebook using- and Parool following Dutch people feel about women showing- and speaking openly about intimacy.

*Mannen met potentie is a series of 20 self portraits showing my search for a guy on Tinder while I was heartbroken after another failed attempt to grow into a romantic relationship. I was sad, confused and above all convinced that I was never going to find love. Unless I would give it one last try on a dating app.